To say Jewish identity is complex is a grand understatement. Are we a race? An ethnicity? a religion? All three? Maybe just two? Perhaps only one? Oh and so many more possibilites.

Are we still Jews if we are only culturally and not religiously connected? Does a Jew born in suburban Philadelphia have some natural kinship with an Asian Jew from Shanghai who in his appearance and language presents as Chinese? Is an atheist Jew born to Ashkenazi parents somehow more Jewish than a converted Jew born to African American parents? If you are a convert and you have children but your children don’t practice are they Jewish? Would an Italian Jew born in say, Florence, Italy who moved to Canada consider himself Italian? What if he was an Orthodox Jew from Florence whose parents were from Poland? Is he Jewish or Italian?

They say Jews love to talk about Jews. Well given the above you get some inkling of why.

I remember when I met my soon to be in-laws and they asked me where my family was from and for many it’s a simple answer, “Oh my family is from Norway” or “My great grandparents came over from Ireland.” My Answer? “I’m Jewish.” They laughed, awkwardly and suggested what what they meant was what country my family were from?

Was there any point in saying, Russia, Ukraine (depending on the day), Romania, Poland (depending on the day), Belarus (depending on the day). Depending on the day because as with the present war in Ukraine and the likely eventual absorption of pieces of Ukraine into Russia, many of these countries changed names multiple times depending on who was in power. One day you’re Belarus, the next you’re Poland, the next your Lithuania and eventually maybe you are Russian. One could do a lot of travel in those days simply by waking up in the morning.

And so what does any of where my family emigrated from have to do with who I am? So . . . you see . . . it’s complex.

Sadly, we go from conundrums to darkness now . . . The truth is in the long history of Judaism and anti-semitism’s ugly stick, it’s not how we define ourselves that counts, it’s how others have defined us.

I will always answer “Jewish.”